To give you a very brief background of my early childhood let me begin with the circumstances of my birth. I was born on the 13th of September 1987 to two of the most wonderful parents, Mr.and Mrs. Norberto I. Billones. It was a blessed day,I would say without batting an eye, because that beautiful day marked the beginning of my journey into a whole new and unknown world.
A year later, my sister Hannah Joppa was born & she was a joy to hav around. Even right now, I can vividly recall the games we used to play with our friends. We used to spend long hours playing, pretending we are
Princesses and beauty queens.
I remember those vacations where my whole family used to go places.We love to travel and we did it a lot of times. The sharing time we had with mom & dad where we read stories together and pray as a family seeking Gods blessings and guidances and yes, the dreams I have nurtured in my young and innocent heart. Those were sweet memories forever etched in my heart. Come to think of it,that maybe the reason most adults wish they were young forever ...
no cares, no problems, ; not even pimples!!!
I grew up though and my interests eventually shifted. I discovered that I have special talents and those I pursued. If ever I have a first love, I wud say its music. True enough I love singing. As a matter of fact I hav been singing since I was a kid. I heard people say I hav a wonderful voice and that is truly a very flattering compliment. I just hope and pray that my talent,my special gift will be a blessing to others. Aside from dancing, I was into sports, particularly volleyball. I was a varsity player for 4 straight years in the Holy Infant Montessori Center girls team. In SY 2003-2004, on my 4th year with the team, I became the Captain ball. It was also during that year, when I joined the search for the Mutya ng Caloocan, after I was chosen to represent my school. At 15, I was the 2nd Runner up in the Mutya search and was chosen as the Best in Talent & Miss Friendship among the many beautiful and equally talented ladies in the contest. That was a feat for any girl my age.
With so much attention, praises, accolades and prestige coming my way, I began to believe I can do anything. I thought I can never go wrong. I became overly confident and boastful even. I knew I have what it takes 2b above d rest of my peers. My first taste of success almost made me forgot the values my parents have patiently and lovingly taught me. Not only that,
I almost forgot that everything I have was from God and that He can take them away anytime. You see, success has a way of misleading us. It gives false security and deceives us into believing that we can make it on our own. It allow us to believe that we are indispensable. It was only later that I found out how wrong that was. For a while I basked in my success. I was unmindful of the danger signs leading to downfall. I did not heed the advises of my parents thinking Im in control, that I know better because it is my life in the first place. I saw things my way and did things the way I believe was right.
Soon enough, doing things my way became the very reason why I started to fail. One thing led to another & before I knew it I was fallin so fast. I have no time to comprehend what went wrong.
From the top of the world experience, I hit bottom. 
It was d lowest and most painful experience in my young life. You see, the most popular girl in school has to drop out in the middle of the school year, at the peak of her popularity she has to exit and live like an exile, away from family and friends. It was the longest & loneliest journey I ever had. I felt so alone, so unloved; I was a failure & life was miserable. For the first time, I felt helpless, defeated and yes, hopeless.
In my young age, I hav been through a lot. My experience, if told, will surely break any parents heart. And it broke my parents heart indeed. During those turbulent and trying times, I have no idea where I am headed. I was in such a mess and I could only visualize the future as bleak and dreary.
But it is somehow ironic that one can only realize the real worth of family, of parents, when times of desperation, of hopelessness set in. It happened to me. During my bleakest moment, I came to realize that there are still people who truly love me despite what I did.
My friends, whose who remained from my past and those who came in after my past, who became my inspiration and my joy. They helped me move on. They, up to now, make me feel special, loved and accepted. They never give me a distorted vision of who I am. My friends always believe on who I really am. They never judge me fromt eh outside, because they know who I really am.
My mom became my source of strength. She opened her heart to me without questions, without reservation. She accepted me wholeheartedly despite the shame and the pain I caused her.
My dad, he was my comforter. Feared his condemnation, his anger but instead he drew me in his loving arms. He did not mind the nasty talks, the intrigues & rumors told about me. I knew he was in pain,but he took it all in stride thinking of me above all.
It was during my loneliest
moment that I experienced Gods love.
In my hopeless & broken state I felt His presence and His compassion. He opened my eyes & showed me where I went wrong. Little by little, I began to understand my purpose in life. It was by Gods grace that I was able to forgive myself & accept my situation. It was a slow & painful recovery, but true to His promise, God delivered me. He give me hope & give me back my joy. I was able to smile again, to appreciate the beauty in the things around me. He became the beacon of light during the times I felt unsure of my path.
The storm in my life came to pass and I am so much happier now. More than anything. I have found a new inspiration, a reason to strive harder. But more than anything, I am a living testimony of Gods unfailing love and unconditional forgiveness.
Now, I am at peace with self. I have a loving and very supportive family and new friends who do not care about my past but loves me for who I am… ♥ Above all, I know that God will never leave me nor forsake me. He has a better plan for me and that plan will surely be for my good.
My experiences have taught me so much. It has changed me for the better. It made me… ♥ stronger & wiser. The Hana you see now is totally different from the person I used to be.
With joy in my life and hope in my heart I am embark once again on my journey in this wonderful and uncertain life. :)
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